Strange Business
I'm not afraid of ghosts. Well, so far. I have not seen a great number of them, but I have seen a few. And I have not encountered a poltergeist, so I think I can say that I'm not afraid of ghosts.
I have only encountered a real ghost sighting a few times. They occurred several times in our home after we moved in two decades ago. It seemed that the woman who had lived in the house since it was built was in no hurry to leave it. Her name was Madge. She was known to most of the neighbors as a very strange sort of person who liked cats, drank too much, and terrified the neighborhood before she died by insisting on chain smoking while dragging a portable oxygen container with her on wheels. The neighbors were pretty sure that she would blow herself (and maybe them) to smithereens. She didn't. She died in our living room.
What we knew of her was mostly through the mail that came for her after we moved in. She was a devout Catholic, VERY involved in the anti-abortion movement. We have lived in this house for nearly two decades and STILL get brochures from Right to Life movements in her name. She also loved cats. She still occasionally receives catalogues for cat products.
T and I have both sighted her several times. Nearly every time we saw her, she seemed to be trying to alert us of a home repair that was needed. A shower that was leaking into the basement crawl space. A leaky roof right above our piano. Cracks in our sprinkler system. A few times we spotted her standing on our deck, a drink in hand, looking out over the back yard. After about ten years, she faded away. We just stopped seeing her. I like to think that she finally decided to go home. To her real home. I've often wondered why she stayed as long as she did. She and her beloved husband built this house and when he died of pancreatic cancer, the neighbors report that she became more and more odd over the years, sometimes wandering around the back yard picking flowers only wearing her underwear.
She never seemed to want to really communicate with T or I. She merely would point at something for us to attend to and then disappear. Now, that she is gone...I wonder sometimes if there are problems with the house that we'll never know about.
Ever since I was a teenager, I have sometimes awakened to feel someone stroking my hair or my back. It is a tender feeling at first and then, as I become more awake, a scary feeling. I generally come awake fast, scared....and sit up. And the feeling is gone. But, the initial feeling has never been frightening. It has been a loving touch, a parental one. Now, that I feel such a precarious hold on life, I wake up to those feelings more often. I frequently feel a presence when I awaken and it is incredibly loving and warm. Instead of pushing it away, I slide towards it in my half awake state but it slips away as I get close to awakening. It's never T. She sleeps on her side, usually not facing me. At any rate, I am not frightened. I am...oddly grateful. So much of my life is pushed by fear these days. It feels lovely to be so sweetly tended.
A few nights ago, I went to bed in pretty severe pain. I asked T to sleep in the guest room because she has restless leg syndrome and my shins were so tender that I could barely stand any pressure on them, let alone a kick in the night. I rubbed my legs with CBD oil and drifted off.
I awakened to a strange noise a few hours later. I checked my watch. It was 12:15. The noise was coming from the table next to my bed. I looked over to see my phone, which was plugged in to re-charge, flashing and making crackling noises. It sounded like the sound that TVs used to make when a signal was lost. White noise. I turned to pick it up and it suddenly went dark. At the same time, the light on my electric blanket went off.
OH, great, I thought. The electricity is off.
Except it wasn't. My clock radio was still on. The red dot on my television across the room indicated that it was plugged in. I reached for my phone and it immediately came to life for me, asking for my code. I turned my electric blanket on again. It came right on.
I'm sure it was just some weird electric blip. Some short in the night. Nothing to worry about.
Except it didn't feel like that. It felt as if someone was....and I know this sounds crazy....
It felt as if someone was saying hello.
So, I did what is in my character. I called out in a small voice.
"Hello to you."
And then I lay down and fell back asleep. I am getting closer to that veil every day. I feel it. And I don't think it is anything to fear. I think there are so many wonderful, magical beings and places to be other than this one that I know so well.
And I am ready to explore.
I have only encountered a real ghost sighting a few times. They occurred several times in our home after we moved in two decades ago. It seemed that the woman who had lived in the house since it was built was in no hurry to leave it. Her name was Madge. She was known to most of the neighbors as a very strange sort of person who liked cats, drank too much, and terrified the neighborhood before she died by insisting on chain smoking while dragging a portable oxygen container with her on wheels. The neighbors were pretty sure that she would blow herself (and maybe them) to smithereens. She didn't. She died in our living room.
What we knew of her was mostly through the mail that came for her after we moved in. She was a devout Catholic, VERY involved in the anti-abortion movement. We have lived in this house for nearly two decades and STILL get brochures from Right to Life movements in her name. She also loved cats. She still occasionally receives catalogues for cat products.
T and I have both sighted her several times. Nearly every time we saw her, she seemed to be trying to alert us of a home repair that was needed. A shower that was leaking into the basement crawl space. A leaky roof right above our piano. Cracks in our sprinkler system. A few times we spotted her standing on our deck, a drink in hand, looking out over the back yard. After about ten years, she faded away. We just stopped seeing her. I like to think that she finally decided to go home. To her real home. I've often wondered why she stayed as long as she did. She and her beloved husband built this house and when he died of pancreatic cancer, the neighbors report that she became more and more odd over the years, sometimes wandering around the back yard picking flowers only wearing her underwear.
She never seemed to want to really communicate with T or I. She merely would point at something for us to attend to and then disappear. Now, that she is gone...I wonder sometimes if there are problems with the house that we'll never know about.
Ever since I was a teenager, I have sometimes awakened to feel someone stroking my hair or my back. It is a tender feeling at first and then, as I become more awake, a scary feeling. I generally come awake fast, scared....and sit up. And the feeling is gone. But, the initial feeling has never been frightening. It has been a loving touch, a parental one. Now, that I feel such a precarious hold on life, I wake up to those feelings more often. I frequently feel a presence when I awaken and it is incredibly loving and warm. Instead of pushing it away, I slide towards it in my half awake state but it slips away as I get close to awakening. It's never T. She sleeps on her side, usually not facing me. At any rate, I am not frightened. I am...oddly grateful. So much of my life is pushed by fear these days. It feels lovely to be so sweetly tended.
A few nights ago, I went to bed in pretty severe pain. I asked T to sleep in the guest room because she has restless leg syndrome and my shins were so tender that I could barely stand any pressure on them, let alone a kick in the night. I rubbed my legs with CBD oil and drifted off.
I awakened to a strange noise a few hours later. I checked my watch. It was 12:15. The noise was coming from the table next to my bed. I looked over to see my phone, which was plugged in to re-charge, flashing and making crackling noises. It sounded like the sound that TVs used to make when a signal was lost. White noise. I turned to pick it up and it suddenly went dark. At the same time, the light on my electric blanket went off.
OH, great, I thought. The electricity is off.
Except it wasn't. My clock radio was still on. The red dot on my television across the room indicated that it was plugged in. I reached for my phone and it immediately came to life for me, asking for my code. I turned my electric blanket on again. It came right on.
I'm sure it was just some weird electric blip. Some short in the night. Nothing to worry about.
Except it didn't feel like that. It felt as if someone was....and I know this sounds crazy....
It felt as if someone was saying hello.
So, I did what is in my character. I called out in a small voice.
"Hello to you."
And then I lay down and fell back asleep. I am getting closer to that veil every day. I feel it. And I don't think it is anything to fear. I think there are so many wonderful, magical beings and places to be other than this one that I know so well.
And I am ready to explore.
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